Dogwood Project

I received an email from Lucky (back in December-yes I have been a very bad blogger) requesting that I post the following announcement about a new organization in D.C. that is taking on the task of battling harassment:

Sexual harassment is around us everywhere we go and ignoring it will not make it go away. Neither will brushing it under a rug. Lawmakers and employers are not doing enough to stop this nauseating behavior so most incidents go unreported giving the harasser a false sense their behavior and harassment is acceptable. What is even worse is when someone actually does speak up and reports harassment they often face retaliatory actions from their harasser, employer and others. These retaliatory actions range from personal threats and stalking to the victim losing their job for reporting the behavior and legal actions against them. Feeling the need to help change these issues, I recently started a grass-roots non-profit organization (The Dogwood Project) that provides aid and support to individuals, both men and women alike, who have reported sexual harassment and now face retaliatory actions. I have also just created a facebook page for the organization -- http://www.facebook.com/group.php?gid=37558609042.

Please come join us in the fight against sexual harassment and for women's rights!!

Upskirting

If you don't know what upskirt photography/pornography is, learn about it here and here.

Maumelle man charged after women complain of harassment

Thanks to the reader who gave us the heads up about this guy, who has been charged with harassment. Click here for the details.

Street Harassment Survey!!

The folks over at Hollaback NYC have a survey about street harassment from Holly Kearl, who is currently writing a book about street harassment.

It is super important we take because street harassment is not written about or researched often.

Help us all out by completing this quick online survey about street harassment:
https://www.surveymonkey.com/s.aspx?sm=2zNzxBfuyVVLMKcoXoEtjQ_3d_3d

I second Hollaback NYC in that, "The more folks who take it, the more accurate it is, the more that changes in the world. Hollaback survey-style!"

Don't Hire/ Date This Guy

I am reposting a post over at Feministing.com here because it is important. Courtney published an article concerning the anti-sexual harassment ads that will begin running on New York subways in an effort to combat subway harassment. She received an ignorant/hateful response from a person who harasses women, you know, that ask for it by getting dressed:

Dear Courtney,

I read your opinions about the MTA raising awareness about sexual
misconduct on the subways and found it very naive and written from a very
white-middle-class-women-studies-privaleged perspective. You are correct
that women have been dealing with this kind of stuff from guys for years,
but what about how women dress in the subways? Today (after reading your
opinion) while on the subway, I saw a woman sit near me with a very low cut
shirt and very large tits...she looked hot! I totally stared at her tits
any chance I could get...which is probably why she wore the shirt right? I
also see scores of women with those cotton summer dresses on and just a
thong underneath, so you see their asses bobbling around under the skirt.
That sounds like blaming the victim right? Well when you leave almost
nothing to the imagination, it doesn't take much for it to run wild. This
is not to say you whip your cock out at any moment or press your boner on
any tart that wears a hot outfit, but where they "asking for it"? I know
you are probably fuming by now, but from the looks of your picture you
probably don't get sexually harrassed much, so maybe you are jealous of all
of the hot-ass bitches with the big titties, shaved snatches and round
asses that get some action underground.

hells to the motherfuckin' yeah!!!!

Chance Noble

She also noted that his email address is snhca@exit3.com, so you can contact him and share your thoughts ;) .

I doubt that those subway ads will deter this clown, as it sounds like he is a pretty far gone misogynist, but hopefully the ads will help create an atmosphere that will shame him into compliance and/or encourage people to expose him and people like him.

Masculinity in Disney Movies: Sexism, Strength, & Dominance

This is a great video that I came across via Feministing.com. Check it out.

Gross Grandpa on Bus

This nasty, ancient fucker kept leering at me over the top of his sunglasses and licking his lips as we rode the #12 bus. Today was my first time wearing shorts after having lost some weight and I was truly confident in my decision as I dressed this morning. This loser almost knocked the wind out of my sails, especially when he leaned forward and commented on how "nice and thick" my thighs look. I glared at him and pulled out my phone to snap his picture. After that, he pretended he never said anything to me.

Score!

A.J.

Article says "At construction sites, catcalls nearing extinction," credits rise in female construction workers

Click HERE for the link.

Points to pick up from this article-(1) women on the street and women in the field are complaining, (2) some companies take action as a result of the complaints, and
(3) there is still no viable definition of street harassment in many states, making exercising any legal remedies near impossible or just not freakin' practical unfortunately.

Also, I wonder how the observation that catcalls around construction sites are becoming less prevalent resonates in Arkansas. It is my experience that catcalls around construction sites in Central and NW Arkansas still occur often.

Man Shoots Girl After Girl and Friends Refused to Give Him and His Friends Their Phone Numbers

Click Here for the link.

Think Twice

I pulled into a Walgreens on Thursday afternoon. I parked near a truck with a man in it. As I was walking into Walgreens I heard a whistle and a comment. I whirled around.

The man looked uncertain as to what would happen next. As if no one has ever confronted him before.

I have to say, what happened next made my day and absolutely encouraged me to keep confronting street harassers.

I walked to his truck and asked him if he whistled at me. He said yes and what amounted to several more harassing comments. I then whipped out my camera phone and started to snap away. He began to squirm, literally, in the passengers seat of the truck. The driver had left the driver's window down, so it was perfect for not only harassing passersby from his perspective, but for recording the harassment from my perspective. I told him if he did not like unwanted attention, he should not force it on others. I was forceful, confident. He was caught off guard, squirming. The power dynamic changed. I had it. It was a good feeling.

90% of Teenage Girls Report Harassment

The link is here.

Via Feministing.

Yale Women's Center Harassers Not Guilty According to School

I know we are about 15 days late on this, but most of us have been sick/out of town/out of sorts. Via Feministing.

Street Harassment Subject of Friday Feminist Fuck You at Feministing!

Girls Accepting Sexual Assault At School As Fact Of Life

Click on the above title, which is a link to a video worth watching. The conclusion of the study is based on a survey of 23 Ontario schools, but I wonder what a similar survey of Arkansas high schoolers would reveal.

Ugh

I was walking across the street to get something out of my car, and these guys felt the urge to yell at me. I also walked past them to go to lunch and got a pretty serious stare down. Ughh...

An Interview with a Harasser and the Harassed

Triple Threat

It takes a small man to make three women almost simultaneously feel like we were the featured items on the menu at a local cafe. But this guy's shameless, lingering, and up and down glare did just that, all while he was standing mere feet away from us. Speaking for myself, my assessment continued even after I put a "WTF?" look on my face and asked "Hey, do I know you?", code for "hey asshole, put your eyes back on the actual menu."

Spin the Bottle-Sex, Lies, & Alcohol

Wrestling with Manhood-Boys, Bullying, & Battering

Naked Man on Kavanaugh

Last Saturday I was jogging down Kavanaugh Boulevard in Hillcrest, by all means a safe, public area. While running on the promenade near Allsopp park I glanced inside a parked car and noticed that a man was sitting in the driver's seat, totally naked and masturbating. I made a mental note to call the police and report him once I got home. A block later, I was crossing Walnut and saw a car pull up the street. To my horror I realized it was the same man. He had gone around the block and was masturbating while watching me jog. I went into a restaurant nearby and called a friend to come get me. I am now in the process of making a shirt which reads "leave me alone, I have mace" which I can wear while jogging.

Emily K.

WAR ZONE

Rubbernecking Boyfriend

Holla!

My boyfriend told me about this website and encouraged me to use it to empower myself and to disempower the men who harass me. He was upset with me for egging on a clerk in a department store who commented on the panties I was buying, told me how good I'd look in them, and how much my boyfriend would appreciate them. I, personally, was amused and didn't feel that disempowered at all. I recognize that a woman should be able to go into a store and purchase lingerie or underwear without any sort of comment whatsoever, but beyond a superficial clerk-and-customer relationship, that young man and I have no obligations to one another.

On the other hand, my boyfriend frequently rubbernecks at young women passing by while in my presence. Not only is this potentially harassing the young women, but it is highly offensive to me--someone for whom he supposedly has respect. So I'd like to post this message to let boyfriends/husbands know that harassment is not reserved for those "other" men who make their girlfriends/wives uncomfortable--it applies to them, too.

Creepy Man at McCain Mall

I am not sure if any of you go to McCain Mall but I have been going there a lot lately and there is a guy that is FREQUENTLY there and he makes NO apologies for checking my friends and I out. The sad thing is, I'm 16 and most of my friends are 16 and 17. This guy looks about mid 40s...and I am being nice.Before I even heard of this website, I took a pic of him.

Courtney C.

Pathetic \pə-ˈthe-tik\ :

Though I know they are already aware, the guys in the blue truck who slowed down, whistled, and proceeded to catcall me while I was walking to Sticky Fingers in broad, lunchtime daylight ARE PATHETIC. I only wish I could have proven so by snapping.

And, just a general comment to those who think this is not a big deal (because apparently you exist). While I realize that many people are not aware of how often women are leered at and catcalled on the streets, many times because they are either (a) not a women or (b) not an LGBTQ individual, until you experience it 5-10 times a week for 10 years, think before speaking and listen before thinking.

And no I will not get over it. And yes, next time I will HOLLABACK.

THE SO-CALLED FRIEND

I was walking to my boyfriend's car after eating dinner with him and his friend, WHOM I HAD JUST MET, IS MARRIED, AND HAS A BABY ON THE WAY.

The "friend," grabbed my butt. Okay, I am thinking, he has had a drink, I will tell boyfriend later (though, in retrospect, this was wimpy, I should have said something right then).

Later did not come soon enough, unfortunately. While walking to the car, he makes a remark about my breasts and then, reaches up the front of my skirt as I am getting into the car.

Needless to say, he is not our friend anymore. He did tell his wife, and I hope he gets help for his and his family's sake. I also wish I would have reported it. These crimes are gravely underreported, and I now understand why a little better-it is embarrassing, victim-blaming is rampant, and frankly, I thought no one would care. Thank goodness I was wrong! Thanks Hollaback!

Lauri

ASSAULTED IN GRACELAND

I'm a NYC resident, and was on a business trip in Memphis this weekend when I was assaulted. I wanted to send a post to Holla Back, because I feel like this will make me feel as if I've reclaimed some of my power. I can't take back what happened and I can't get it out of my head, I just need to tell the world what he did.The story starts - I was at Graceland when it happend yesterday afternoon at around 1:30 pm yesterday with a friend. I was on a tour of the house with about 8 other people. If you havn't been to Graceland, it is a museum of sorts. The house is pretty small and so the tour group gets herded from one room to the next. I was stopped taking a picture and leaning over a railing . That's when I felt it. A man, about 40 years old, wearing a blue windbreaker and a buzz cut- walking past with his friend reaches UNDERNEATH ME, between my legs and grabs my ass and reaching the front of my crotch. He keeps walking. I whipped around to scream "Are you fucking kidding me?!?" and everyone in the tour was wearing those stupid tour-headsets and no one said anything. So, I walked into the next room following the guy and tapped him on the shoulder, I didn't know what I was going to say - so I just kept tapping him on the shoulder. He pretended not to feel my tapping and hear my voice - and continued to take pictures. I asked him a few times "Are you fucking kidding me?! Did you just grab my ass??!!" and he didn't respond.. I said it again and he responded "No, I was just taking pictures." He turns around and looks at his child-molester looking friend behind him and asks if it was him.. and he just shrugs his shoulders. Walking around the room, I'm in fucking Elvis's house here - mind you - and there's a security guard right there, but I didn't know what to do. I didn't want to make a scene more than I already had -it's this completely silent room with a dozen strangers, and my ass and crotch were just grabbed. The feeling of a complete loss of power and thought and coping skills was just overwhelming. I went and told my friend (loudly) what had just happened and we stood there, in shock, me shaking - not knowing how to feel better about this. The guy was denying anything happened, and I just wanted to cry, but didn't want to cry in front of him. So I thought it over and decided, it would be worse if no one believed me, or if he got angrier and made me feel worse, so I kept on going and just tried to avoid him the rest of the afternoon.. I think a security guard heard me talking loudly about what had happened, and so next thing I know, I have 2 security guards following me at a distance around the grounds. This made me feel even worse - I thought the guy had told them that I had threatened him or something, and felt so dirty and disgusting and as if somehow, I had done something wrong. I eventually, an hour later - saw him again and told a security guard what had happened. The guard approached the men, who again - denied it was them - and the guard came back to tell me - they had denied it. I'm sorry. I think they should have been kicked out, but it didn't surprise me that they didn't do it.Ever since the moment I was grabbed, I have been replaying the situation over and over in my head, wishing I could have done or said something better than what I did. I wish I could have just kicked him in the nuts, or started screaming and cursing and telling him what a pathetic human being he was that not only does he grab stranger's crotches, he can't own up to it. Tell him that because he can grab people doesn't mean he's got any sort of power, in fact, it shows how pathetic and powerless he is. I have taken self-defense classes before, but at that moment I was defenseless, speachless. I've never been one to have a good one-liner waiting in the wings, but I really wish I had just this once. I'm proud that I at least had the good sense (thanks to some amazing women I know who don't put up with any shit) to walk up to him and confront him. Hopefully that changed the power dynamic a little bit. I'm also proud that I eventually told a security guard. I guess all I can hope is that The King, up in heaven will defend my honor, I'm almost certain Elvis doesn't allow sexual assault in his living room. I hope that he can make sure that fuckhead got run over by a go-cart from hell on the way home last night. Hopefully, the spirit of Graceland won't be ruined for me - or maybe it's time to move onto another hollywood home, something more empowering, like Dollywood. The worst thing about this, was this was not the first time this has happened, nor will it be the last. This was a particularly aggressive move, but it happens every day to women who were not 'asking for it.' Next time, however - if its on the subway, or in a crowd, or in a museum like this was - I will scream, and I will kick and I will punch that asshole and I don't care if I'm making a scene or not.Thanks Hollaback for doing what you do, and for making a space for me to reclaim my power.Submitted by J

Peace, Love, and Harrassment

While I was at a stoplight in Fayetteville, Arkansas, I saw some commotion out of the corner of my eye. I looked over only to see two apparent proponents of peace & love (as shown by their custom shoe polish job)making the two fingered call me sign while shouting "hey baby." Because there were no babies around, I assumed they were referring to me. So, I whipped out my phone, and, just as the light turned green, snapped of shot of these two meatballs. If only they would have afforded me the peace and love they claimed to advocate on their window. . . .

SUPER CREEPY

While at Barnes & Noble, I had a sneaking suspicion that I was being watched. I looked up. I saw this creepy, creepy man who was leering at me and every other woman in the cafe that walked past him. This unmistakeable, shameless display of intense staring went on for about a half hour. It was so sickening, I could not concentrate so I had to pack up and leave. And I did, right after snapping his picture.